Arrgh! These 2 days were like terrible. Why am I always causing so much trouble? I want to make things better but I just make things worst then before. It was all my fault!! So terrible at handling things like this. From now on I will not help anymore. Shouldn't act clever. Maybe I just shouldn't even join in the clique. After I joined in, there are so much things happening. I just bring their whole group down. Maybe what other friends say were right, I just have too much things to handle and to listen but I am still carrying on more things that i can't bear. I should just leave things in the way they should be and not touching or handle it myself. Just acting clever. I should know where i stand and not help others by bothering them.

School term is ending and I still unsure about my studies. I just can't concentrate well. Why am I living for this 18 years of life. Feeling so damn useless! Didn't even achieve anything. Not good in studies, friendship messed up, even I found myself not devoted to a religion. My whole life is in a total mess. Can someone pick me up? Is this God's test?

Still haven't started my case study for CPPB. Will try to complete soon by Thursday night! My only aim for now. Then after that all my schools stuffs to study. Not going to touch anything about my wounds and personal life. Just study! Leave everything to after exams! I will try my best to do that. Don't want to be a failure and let others to see me as a failure!